Well I’m really happy and I want to boast.

Yes, this is my blog and if you don’t like then go away!

Jean saw my story board for my range yesterday as part of my design assessment and she said my range is one of the best stylised ranges in terms of consistency of style features.

It was really a confidence booster considering it’s going to be bloody difficult to make. I really hated it in the initial design process because I thought it looked really boring and conservative. But now that I’m getting to details and realising it, I’m getting happier and happier with it.

I am a conservative female who dresses in a very preppy style. It’s only fair that my range reflects that.

In other news I’ve sorted out my pattern box (which started my dust allergies again) and I’ve found some really interesting things that I need to make. But the problem with these patterns is that most of them are from the 70s when patterns were single sized so I have to grade them if I want it to fit. This could be either very interesting or very bad. Grading is one of my stronger skills but my experience is still quite limited.

Now that I have stacks of free time due to TAFE holidays and revue season is officially over, I should actually get some stuff done!

I’ve been feeling really crap lately.

1. Post-show. So CSE Revue is over, there’s not as much to fill my days with. I’m not forced to socialise with my friends and I have to spend more time at home with my parents. I don’t really want to do anything either, just that I don’t have anything I’m in an all fire rush to you.

2. My parents. They make me feel like I’m a total dissappointment sometimes. A large part of this is because I’m rather concious that I have not fulfilled their expectations of me – and that bothers me. I’m happy doing the things that I am doing, I just wish I had their blessing.

3. My job. I finished looking after Sam yesterday. I cried when I got out and got into the car. I have been looking after Sam for over 18 months. He doesn’t really understand that I won’t be looking after him again in the future which kind of made me feel sad as well, that he is too young to understand and love me. I have an interview with another family this afternoon, but it still wrenched my heart.

4. Men. Or in particular, one man who has made me realise that I’m still such a fool to make the same mistakes.

5. My health. Due to point 4, I have been binge eating for the past week. As a result, my body is starting to hate me and yesterday I didn’t want to eat my junk food dinner but I made myself consume the copious amounts of sugar. So yeah, I highly recommend food that isn’t deep fried or has a high sugar content. I now have a headache and a stomache half the time .

6. Schoolwork. I have loads of it, but refer to point 1, I don’t really want to do it.

7. The fact that I called one of my closest guy friends and forced him to say that he loves me to get some comfort from the above sundry points.

In summary, I have this apathetic attitude that I can’t shake coupled with the fact that I am a pathetic person.

teeeheeed

I thought;j it wa s a bitliant inspired idead of steaphnaie’s to have some alcohol cbeacuse that makes eveyrithing pbeter apparently.

 I’m allo itpsy at tafe atm which is aweosme and not like the stupid bouws that i ntend to hoka up with becauwse they ae  al lc rap. mken suck.

life si so mujchoi mor eaweoms nolw.

Srtaertphpanie say s i’m not allowed tohav eon any  more.d but that’s ok,. I npought lots of lovely pretty stockign from the internets!!!!#

I’m all sleepyu hno w.

I went out on a date on Tuesday night – it was really lovely.

We went to the pub had a couple of drinks.

It’s kind of weird how well I got along with him considering I had only spoken to him exactly twice previously in my life at 3 year intervals. Surprisingly unawkward, as if we’d really known each other for years. It was very sweet, he bought me a drink and on the way back to my car, it was cold and I was shivering so he put his arm around me.

However, he’s got issues due to a past relationship and in the wrong frame of mind to further pursue things.

To quote Tina yet again: “It’s not enough to be the right person, it has to be the right person at the right time.”

At least it’s restored my faith in men and the possibility of not having a completely weird, screwed up relationship.

So, it’s confirmed! My younger brother is attending my birthday party which is going to be held at the house we both live in.