I am turning into a megabitch at the moment.

I’ve worked for the past month with only one full day off.

I am exhausted. I am cranky.

I hate the people that I work with as they are slowly driving me insane because they are precisely the type of people who I would not choose to associate myself with.  For a start, though I am the supervisor they do not see me with any real authority and treat most things I say as a joke. They also do not have the capacity to accept more than one direction at any one time or ignore directions completely. They ask stupid, inane questions that really they already know they answer to and generally just waste my time. Also, quite a few of them smoke so they use that an excuse to stop every hour and disappear off for 10-15 minutes.

I know we get paid by the hour, but STOP WASTING MY TIME.

It is funny, theoretically I should be all for dawdling if I get paid by the hour. But when I work, I work hard. I just want to get the job done. Possibly this train of thought has been drummed into me when I started folding folders for my dad since I was 15 and the seemingly never ending pile had to be conquered. And now with my supervisory role and doing a lot of the technical work, I am the first to start and the last to finish. I told Mohammed when he came back for a couple of jobs this year “I hate being you”.

Surprisingly, what all this has proved is a testament to the new drugs I am currently taking. My psychiatrist put me on 300mg of Aurorix a day and I am alert for work. Even though I moan and bitch constantly, I am there to do the job without fail. Some days I get little sleep, I actually manage to survive in stark contrast to last year where I would just faint on my feet. My psychologist is very upbeat with all the progress I have made recently and we’re scaling back on duration between visits.

So yes, I am cranky and generally hate everyone right now. But I am starting to live again. I could reflect more on this statement, but every time I have done with people I end up in tears. Which is funny. I used to rarely cry before. Now I do it almost at a drop of a hat. But now that uni exams are over and more workers are available I can cut back on a few shifts… in approximately 2 weeks. <insert rant on having to do the monthly club jobs on top of our insane schedule here> Then I can see if I can reboot my life again, go out with old friends and make some new ones.

I have now also found a quality that any future partner of mine must have. He must be numerate, and know how to count. Otherwise I am going to bash them over the head with a barcode scanner.

Much love and no sleep!

Tahmoh is no longer appearing at Supernova!!!!!!!

Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww

I have been so flat out at work that I had not bought a ticket yet, but now I do not think I shall even go.

Despite our very busy stocktake season, I had the morning scheduled off so I could pay homage. Sadly, this was not meant to be.

*sniffles*

sigh

I think this means I will be watching more BSG to make up for it.